My last year of being a teenager will start soon and I don’t know how to spend it. I want to experience awesome-ness this year. But before planning what to do this year I looked back, reflected… I was thinking about how much change there is.

When I was a kid I was so close to my mom and I remember a few awkward habits I have back then; like leaning your cheek on your shoulder when having a picture, or that count to three then hold your breath to release your anger thingy… I miss those days where I could let go of things so easily.

Then I grew a little older and I started hating my family. I was an only child for 11 years and growing up with a troublesome family is hard for a kidd… I think I should not go much into details about this part. Anyway I can remember telling my classmates that I don’t have a dad… and I was pretty shy back then. I don’t talk as much as I do. And I don’t smile. AT ALL. I was a gloomy kid back then.

But now… Well my mom told me that I smile even though I’m just talking. I gained self-confidence and things are going better.

—

As a part of this backtrack thing, I checked my archive a few days ago. I was laughing and sorta sad. I miss those people who greeted my last year. I miss the days na we still talk to each other… I don’t know why we grew apart… Imma stop here.

This would be my third year to celebrate my birthday with Tumblr on my side :)